Burial Ground Massacre

You don't fuck with the resting place of the dead - for if they don't haunt you, their living descendants will; a lesson that we've learned far too many times from the horror genre. You don't mess with the headstones, you don't dig up bodies, and you definitely don't build a manor directly on top of the grave sites - if only someone had told that to the family in BURIAL GROUND MASSACRE, maybe some lives would have been spared! This is the main premise of the new to streaming film directed by Daniel Dahlstrom and David Gere who take a disrespectful white family and have them heartlessly build on top of the ancient burial ground, and as the story unwinds, any price must be paid to retrieve a Native American artifact that is locked away inside the home. It's a pretty sinister concept for a film that truly has some potential for a killer horror flick; the film even brings Michael Madsen to the screen, but it is to portray what is sadly one of the only redeeming qualities of the film. After checking out the trailer and figuring the story must be pretty good, I jumped right into the film without hesitation and an hour and forty minutes later I just found myself bored and out five bucks. The film overall is a total flop unfortunately, but the time wasn't totally wasted since there's plenty of boobage to go around - pretty much every female in the film shows their tits at some point, so that's kinda cool I guess. But as for Burial Ground Massacre, it's gonna be a hard pass from us this Halloween season.

Chase is a college aged dude from a wealthy family who clearly has some issues socializing with people. So when his family go away for the weekend, his buddy Javon calls up some friends and they host a small party at the manor that Chases' family owns - a tremendous property in the woods that even has an indoor bowling alley. As the party awkwardly goes underway, the group of three girls and three guys make their way into the family's study, a room which Chase's dad strictly forbade him from entering. Turns out, the study is filled with artifacts of the Native American tribe that used to inhabit the land that the manor is built on... until Chase's predecessors came and pillaged the land from the tribe. As the group are playing around with some of the artifacts, one of the girls finds a book with some legends about the property... and from there, the group learn about the ring that possesses an ancient curse. Long story short, one of the girls puts the ring on and a bunch of trouble begins to stir up as the Native American tribe tries to hunt the ring down to return it to their possession. Will the college kids survive the night running from the contractor hired by the tribe who just wants the ring back? Or will they, too, fall victim to centuries worth of bloodshed over the land? Find out in... BURIAL GROUND MASSACRE!

What starts off really strong unfortunately leads to a story that never really goes anywhere, a killer who looks totally bad fucking ass but pulls some weak and uncreative kills, and a couple of college kids who are just dull and annoying, even the actors playing the parts seem like their bored in all of the scenes by their complete lack of enthusiasm for 90% of the film. It honestly feels like the only really enthusiasm are in the scenes where there are kills happening, and even then, the best scenes aren't even a part of the main storyline, they are kills that occur both before and after the manor killing spree. Weird. There are a lot of scenes in the film that just feel like they drag on for so long and simply just go... no where, almost like the films 80 minute runtime could've been cut down to just an hour when you take out a lot of the fluff, especially towards the end where the film just simply doesn't want to die. It felt like the movie ended at least three times before the credits began to roll, and while the ending was just okay, it is unfortunately just not worth sitting through the rest of the film to get to it. Like I mentioned earlier, though, the masked killer that you'll see throughout the film is the only real redeeming quality here, and it's not even the kills he pulls but the sick looking mask he wears the entire film. I've watched dozens and dozens of the films like this one, where the storyline may not be as amazing as it seemed in the trailer, but the kills usually make up for it; this is sadly not the case for Burial Ground Massacre where the kills just didn't do anything for me. Definitely a shame that the puzzle pieces couldn't just come together to create a semi-decent flick, but I guess that's the way it goes sometimes. If you can watch it for free on streaming services in the future, you're pretty much just watching for some great sets of boobs at that point honestly. Unfortunately, for me, Burial Ground Massacre is the real massacre here. (But still, let's not fuck around with any more ancient burial sites please, we don't need any more curses leashed upon us!)