The Amityville Harvest

Just in time for Halloween next week, a new Amityville horror flick has recently hit streaming services and even though it has almost nothing to do with the notorious home itself, The Amityville Harvest is actually perfect for your holiday horror viewing party! If you like your horror with some creepy villains, some silly victims and some predictable-yet-wicked twists, The Amityville Harvest is going to - at the very least - entertain you during its hour and a half runtime. But if hearing "Amityville" in the name makes you think you're getting a film even remotely similar to a haunted house flick, unfortunately you'd be mistaken because even though the movie takes place in a creepy funeral parlor and aging manor, it's definitely no Amityville Horror. But putting that aside, the unexpected awesomeness this film delivers is one of the best creatures in all of horror: vampires! And not just the creatures, but the sinister slaughter that they bring with 'em! I went into this film not really knowing what to expect and was more than pleasantly surprised with how much I loved the overall storyline, characters and even the action. While The Amityville Harvest doesn't really push something we haven't seen before or that will stand out in a line-up of horrors, it's absolutely a fun, intriguing and clever film that is well worth your time and money. Do I see myself watching it more than once? Not anytime soon, but I can definitely see myself rewatching it on a rainy autumn day next spooky season.

The plot to The Amityville Harvest is a pretty simple one; Christina (Sadie Katz) arrives at the gorgeous, aging manor in Amityville, New York with her documentary crew after being granted permission by its owner - Vincent Miller (Kyle Lowder) - to gain some insight into the manor and its history in liquor-smuggling during probation. The crew are blown away by the property but are warned by Vincent that the funeral parlor and the basement of the house were off-limits. Vincent gives off some creepy yet distinguished vibe when he's around, but it doesn't seem to bother anybody. The crew gets underway with their extensive, three hour interview with Vincent as he gets into details about his great grandfather and his time during the civil war. At the close of the interview, the crew run through their recordings to find the unexplained: the video camera recorded nobody in the chair in front of it, the microphones didn't pick up Vincent's talking at all, only Christina's, and the photo camera only took all-black shots. As Christina sees all of this and assumes her crew has failed her, her documentary crew are - one by one - discovering the truth about what's going on: Vincent is a vampire, and he's hungry for some dinner!!! Will the crew be able to escape Vincent's vampiric grip before he drains them of their life?! Find out in... THE AMITYVILLE HARVEST!

If that short synopsis of the film doesn't sound like it's the basis for a totally awesome vampire film, maybe you should skip this one entirely. But, if it sounds as awesome as it is, I think you'll find it's a clever (but admittedly cheesy) little film with some pretty evil scenes and some characters you'll love to see succeed (or be eaten!). For a film released by Lionsgate, it definitely doesn't feel Hollywood at all; it feels like a Kickstarter-backed indie film, which you know we love here, so it definitely doesn't feel as overly polished and tacky as Hollywood horrors tend to be. The scenes one-by-one may not be a big thrill for some, but I think the success in this film is in the overall product. The film as a whole is well put together, Vincent is a total creep but there's something mystical about him, and watching the crew members interact and fall apart together is pretty entertaining enough. Vincent Miller plays really subtle mind games with his house guests, and it begins to get to them... one by one. That's probably the best part of the film. The film won't mindfuck you or make you pull the sheets over your head in the dark, but it'll at least give you a smile or two, if that's worth it to you. Check it out!